Preschool woes.

So preschool has not really gotten much better for Luke. Today was the 4th day. On the second day, I left and he cried for a half hour straight before I got him. On Thursday, I went with him for an hour and a half, he cried for some of it still but also went and played. Today I took him when they were outside. He started playing until I told him goodbye then flipped out. He did sit on one of the teacher's laps for awhile but cried for most of the hour I left him. (Ran to buy baby food for Matthew and then went back to check on him, he was standing at the door crying.)

I actually really like his teachers now. And the program. But I am leaning heavily towards pulling him out. I will give it one more day to get much better, talk to our ped tomorrow, etc. I mean, we "could" keep doing what we are doing and I am sure eventually it would get to the point where he would play more than cry. I am not sure I want to work this hard at it, though, or force it as much as we are.

It has gotten to the point where our typically pretty independent kid is very clingy everywhere now. I went to IKEA this weekend while we were in Chicago for a couple hours with Matthew, accidentally left my cell phone in the car, and came back to find Joe had tried to call me 5 times because Luke kept crying for me. Luke does prefer me and prefer to go with me whenever, that's not really new since he's with me more than Joe, but it's definitely not like him to cry when I'm not there.

And then he says, "School, sad. I cry." And I keep trying to say, "No! School is fun! You play with friends. You play outside. You sing songs!" But he just keeps up with the "school. cry" stuff.

Also, the High Maintenance parents and kids. I do not like them. (The first day of school they hogged the window. The second day, they practically shoved me out of the way, while I was standing there holding Matthew, and I was standing to the side of the window so people could still see, not in the middle of it like they do. The third day, they made their kids flip out because they stayed and kept standing at the door where the kids could see them--it happened at least 3 times in the time I was there. I feel really sorry for the teachers. Apparently, their husbands drop them off with the kids in the morning and they stay there the entire time, every day, watching in the hallway. Their kids are criers too and cry the entire time, while they watch them from the hallway, for the 3 hours.) The rest of the kids (10 others) and their parents are fine. But those four. Ugh. I know that I don't get to pick who his classmates are but hopefully we won't run into any other obnoxious foursomes like these ones. I mean, who stays there for 3 hours, EVERY day, and then just stands in the hallway watching your kid cry the whole time? What is the point of that? I don't get it.And I think they are planning on being dropped off and watching in the hallway the whole entire year.

So anyway. I am not so worried about having to have Luke in full time care next year anymore, because #1 I doubt I will get in the ultrasound school program yet (100+ people would have had to decide to drop off the list.) #2 He will be a year older and maybe better able to handle it then. #3 Hopefully my mom is still going to retire for real this year (now she is starting to waver about it) and could watch him most of the time/part time.

The main thing is, I could use a break from him for a few hours a week. I am a better mom-I have a lot more patience for the typical two year old stuff- when we have a few hours apart a week. And with Matthew as a total mama's boy as well, I want Luke to get to do more "fun" stuff like play doh and crafts and finger paint and new stories and stuff that I really just don't have the time or the energy to mess with right now. (Matthew is still not sleeping through the night. Half the time Luke doesn't either. And then they are both up by 5 or 6 am at the latest. So yeah, breaking out the finger paint is not going to happen very often.) But this is turning out to be a whole lot of work and stress and I'm leaning towards it not being worth it, especially for what we are paying, and especially since he's only 2. 

The worst part is that I totally didn't see this coming at all. I was so sure he would do great and love it. I was so excited for him to start. Now I feel like I obviously didn't know my kid at all.

I found an in home daycare-preschool that is Montessori based that I really like what I've seen of, online. Unfortunately, she isn't doing part day options though she does have a 2 full days a week option (that is only slightly more than we are paying now for 3-hours and it includes 2 meals and snacks.) I don't think Luke is ready for full day, anytime soon, but I am thinking that may be a good option for us-maybe starting in January. (I would probably just pay the full day rate and just pick him up after lunch.)

I am going to try again on Thursday, I guess, at least give him an hour. If he doesn't do significantly better, I think we are going to stop and try again later. It just sucks, stressing out about it and not having any magic answers about what to do.

On a brighter note, with the exception of Luke's sadness missing me, and my IKEA trip from hell (spoiler: it started when Matthew pooped all over his clothes and car seat and I had no back up outfit for him since we had used it the day before and very few wipes, it didn't get much better from there.), we had so much fun in Chicago. (And I managed to get in two trips to IKEA that were not hellish.) We were really glad we went and think we may do it again next year. I will write a longer post with pictures on that later.