Hospital, day 3

After giving me some false hope and moments of indecision, I thought I might actually get to go home today. But my hand is still a little red and they gave me an allergic reaction yesterday because they decided they'd try to give me a medicine in the penicillin family even though I'm allergic to penicillin. (Although to be fair, I haven't had it since I was little and a lot of people do outgrow a penicillin allergy. I've had amoxicillin and it was fine so they were hoping this would be okay.) It was in my iv for about 5 minutes when I started itching my arm, looked down and my arm was covered in a rash. Joe called my nurse who was back in the room before she could even pick up her phone, stopped it, flushed the iv, and my arm was better no less than 5 minutes later. I am also allergic to tagaderm which is the tape they use to cover iv's. Apparently they can't not use it because of the risk of infection, especially when I'm already here for an infection. So I have a blotchy spot on the crook of my arm from where my first IV was attached. The infectious disease doctor had the nerve to argue with the nurse that "that" was my rash and I already had it. Uh, no, totally different spots on my arm, and where the tagaderm was actually didn't itch because luckily it was there for less than 24 hours. (Where my current iv is, is probably going to be bad, but I've had IV's in 3 different spots and this one is the first that's not in an annoying place like right on my wrist (which really hurt) and the crook inside my arm. Anyway, I guess I'm here till tomorrow.

It is looking good that I won't need surgery although I think the hand surgeon would love to open up the puncture wound and drain it out, (I'm not sure that he thinks of that as surgery). I'm afraid that would make me stuck here even longer and I am already about DONE. So is Joe. He actually mentioned I could just check myself out. Technically, I could, but I'm pretty sure when you leave against medical advice that insurance usually refuses to pay the bills. And I'm sure my little "vacation" is going to be quite costly at least for my insurance. On the bright side, my $250 ER copay is exempt since I was admitted. Our inpatient copay is 0, but I think that may be after our $1000 deductible is met. Probably not the worst thing ever that I met our deductible quite early in the pregnancy, now everything else should be 100% covered. Yay me.

It is weird and sucky being here but also okay.

 The okay part is breakfast in bed. (French toast and strawberries.) And having time to read mostly uninterrupted.

The weird part is like suddenly not being a parent anymore. I don't know when Luke last ate, I don't know how he slept last night, etc. (I am trying not to bug Joe very much because I know they aren't sleeping great and so if they do happen to be sleeping, I don't want to call and wake him up.)

The sucky part is I cried yesterday when Joe and Luke left. Not so much for Joe, we've been apart before, I don't love it. But Luke. Ugh. We haven't been apart like this since he was born. And I hate it. I want him to just stay here with me (I'm sure Joe wants that too by this point!) but I know the hospital isn't exactly the healthiest place for him to be and there isn't a ton for him to do and it's not really what's best for him to be here 24/7 though I'd love nothing more than to just keep him here. So I try to suck it up, but ugh, it sucks. I knew obviously I'd have to stay after my c-section but I was hoping that my OB would let me go after 2 nights and I already know the c-section drill so no big deal. So it's pretty freaking frustrating that I am probably going to be here longer for my fricking hand than I hopefully will for a c-section. And Luke is having a hard time with it, he flips out whenever Joe leaves the room at home and yesterday while he was here he flipped out when I went into the bathroom. He was already a little clingy before all this.

I guess the baby is okay. My OB stopped in and shook her head yesterday. "I just saw you two days ago!" Uh, yeah..she's not too worried about it hurting the baby. It was her surgery day and she didn't have the doppler on her and the hospital ones suck this early, so I guess I just have to assume all is well at least until I make Joe bring my doppler up here the next time he comes. 

I know it could be a lot worse, but ugh, this stinks.